The life of the Pastor can be brutal. My wife was listening to a Christian talk-show where a former pastor had left the ministry for the business world and was so adamant about never returning to the pastorate. He was angry and although not directly, he blamed the church for his departure. I have been in ministry almost two decades and have seen some harshness in the church, however I have never seen a minister leave their post where there was complete blame on the church. The reality is that we ministers have a responsibility to keep a joyful and nourished heart no matter what our circumstances are. This takes effort and toughness, and it will pay off with a stronger ministry and a happier life. Sometimes we make things way too difficult in the Christian life. Keep it simple, sacred and sincere and good things follow.
1. Forgive quickly - Look church work is hard and people will harm us. People will say things to your spouse that are inappropriate and judge your kids with completely unrealistic criteria. This is wrong and it hurts, yet we have a command to forgive those who harm us, especially those in the church. If we don’t we won’t be able to experience forgiveness.
Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. (Matthew 18:21-22 ESV)
Be quick to forgive others and your family will love your new attitude. Sometimes this means standing in front of a mirror, opening your palms and saying… ‘Lord I forgive _____, and let go of the wrong they did to me.’ (And then repeating the process daily until your emotions line up with your will.)
2. Pray often - Brother Lawrence wrote his book about practicing the presence of God when he was cleaning kitchens and toilets.
I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.(John 15:5 ESV)
These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. (John 15:11 ESV)
Church work is hard and life in the role of a minister is beyond our ability. We do not have enough skills or abilities to do God’s business. However when we pray, when we listen to God we remember that it is God’s work and it is fun.
Teresa of Avila once said that God is not really silent, we are just deaf. Nothing brings joy to our hearts and energy to our work like spending time with God. Make prayer the center of every task, meeting and visit. A prayer before working on a sermon, a prayer on the way to a hospital visit or stopping the board meeting to prayer reminds us God is in charge and we need to listen. (This also takes a lot of pressure off!)
3. Work Hard - One of the hardest jobs I had was working at a Baptist Encampment. The hours were long and in the off-season the tasks were dirty and exhausting. However each night I went home feeling the glow of putting in a full days work and knowing I had accomplished a task. There is nothing more rewarding than working hard, however in the church so much of our time is responding to needs that it is easy to look back at our day and wonder what we accomplished. I think following a work-flow system is essential, whatever it is…I still love Covey’s 7Habits and don’t think you can beat it. If you don’t plan the work you will do, you won’t do it and there is nothing worse than going home wondering if you made any difference or accomplished a thing. Take an afternoon and plan how you are going to plan. Hard work brings joy!
And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.(Colossians 3:17 ESV)
4. Use Trusted Counsel - being able to pick up the phone and call someone to talk about our ministry issues is not just a good idea, it is healthy as well. I have a couple of trusted mentors that I talk with a couple times a year. They have given me great insight without being judgmental and more often than not give me questions to wrestle with.In fact I am still in ministry because a friend took me out to Braums, bought me an ice cream and asked me point blank, ‘Has God removed your call from the ministry.’ Having someone who has been through the same things we deal with in ministry to talk with on a consistent basis is awesome. Consider getting a coach or mentor to help you walk through some issues. (Be ready to buy their lunch or pay them something for their time and expertise if this moves beyond an occasional call). Your denomination probably has some folks who are trained and ready to help you along.
Realize you are not alone and you can have a nourished and joyful heart in the midst of the most difficult ministry seasons. What would you add to this list?
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